Truth and Beauty
October 31, 2007 I really struggled for a long time with volunteers; finding them, getting them, keeping them. It's taken a year, but in the last little while I've seen some real servants begin to show up - I have no idea where they come from. I had a conversation today with a man who volunteers; he told me about how his entire perspective on life has changed by being here - how he has been changed. He said, "We have to realize that these are God's people." There's also the two ladies who come in to organize the shelves and clean - they just dropped out of the sky and they do this wonderful thing for us by organizing our shelves and cleaning fridges. You have no idea how big a deal this is for us. Today I glanced out the kitchen door and saw them standing in the middle of the dining room with their heads bowed. I could have wept for the beautiful simplicity of it. They're convinced that coming in and cleaning shelves and fridges and wiping down chairs in the dining room is - their exact words - "God's work".
I also walked through our building today with a city cop who was on a fact-finding mission. His big question? How do you stop people from taking advantage of the public meals? Saying that I don't think anyone does take advantage of the program and I wouldn't really care if they did - well, that didn't make sense to him. Our building didn't seem good enough to him, he commented on the fact that it appeared run-down. Well, it is run-down - all homeless folks ever get is the rest of the world's cast-offs. And you know, I've been around cops pretty much my whole life and I can tell you for certain that he was laughing at me. He had that cop 'wait till I tell the guys about this' expression. Okay fine, we're all idiots. Now go away.
Okay, this is the deal - either you see through the eyes of God, and hear through the ears of God, and live through the heart of God, or you don't. I've seen those who do, have known some of them, have had the incredibly humbling experience of working alongside them. I visited another ministry in another town tonight, and saw them there also, in the hearts of a few daring rebels who put on a Halloween night dinner for a bunch of folks trapped in absolutely desperate poverty; one prayed over a quietly pained woman, holding her in her arms, before taking her to the hospital - and we became strangely still in that moment, we became who we were meant to be. These are living beatitudes, servants who are incomprehensibly beautiful, who perfume the air around them with the loving fragrance of God's presence, who have a peaceful gentleness and humility you see nowhere else. These messages written in love are immediately recognizable for their mystical, otherworldly appearance as they walk and live and work in the glory that surrounds the very being of God.
You betray everything you thought you knew about Christianity by doing this kind of work. You meet that betrayal in the only way you can, at midnight in a garden of prayer, with the name of friend and a kiss upon your lips, while your boisterous friends lie sleeping in in the dew, but a few feet away from the Christ, the Messiah.
This is the Kingdom of God.
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Reader Comments (17)
Thank you.
:)
What did you mean by this? What did you (or anyone) think you knew about Christianity that was betrayed?
it is a touching and wonderful post.
5 years ago I directed a ragtag ministry with the poor that include a once-a-week shelter in a church building with air mattresses, etc.
What that cop doesn't know is: treat people with dignity and there's no need to worry about being taken advantage of. If the folks who stay at the shelter "own" the shelter, they will treat it with respect, more or less.
dsheff - I just wanted him to go away.
The Lady At The End of the Couch - I had a conversation with another cop a few days ago. His take was that they see so many people who are fighting for their lives and then encounter drug addicts and drunks who are throwing them away...
Karen - Yup - exactly!
Anna - I grew up believing that Christianity was a list of 'do's' and 'don'ts', that it was all about who was 'in' and who was 'out'. For much of my life I thought that living as a Christian was about righteousness when in fact it was about grace - something altogether different. When I talk about seeing God amidst poverty, alcoholism, addictions and sin many of the preachers and ministers I've known would say that I serve a different God than they do - and theymight be right.
John - It really all does come down to grace, doesn't it?
I didn't really understand how what you said answered my question. But if you meant pretty much the same thing as rhymes with kerouac, then I understand that.
"...so many people who are fighting for their lives and then encounter drug addicts and drunks who are throwing them away..."
Maybe I haven't been doing this long enough, but I find it hard to tell the difference. The more I talk to people, the more I realize how much more complicated their lives are than mine and that the fact that someone is addicted doesn't necessarily mean they're throwing their life away.
I spent an hour in the car this morning with a friend who is on house arrest (she had her permission letter in her pocket) telling me what addiction looks like from her perspective. She's very realistic about her situation, but desperately and passionately tries to get up on top. (Then at 3:30 this morning, she had a phone call from someone wanting to sell her something very special. Telemarketing has entered new territory, it seems.)
We talked about the fact that she had no food in the house and she called her neighbours and all but one refused to lend her anything and what a glorious thing it is when someone responds to their own destitution by giving, because they don't want to see someone else in the same position, rather than by hoarding.
Some of us were talking the other day about advocacy, and how someone who has had their phone messages and letters ignored can suddenly start getting somewhere when one of us who have the 'super-power of respectability' speaks on their behalf or shows up with them.
And everytime we have one of these chats, I'm struck by the parallel between what we try to do with and for our new friends and what Jesus has done for us.
He became destitute so that we wouldn't be. He brings to bear his 'power of respectability' on our behalf with the Father.
I know I've been lied to. I know I've been presumed upon. I know that the money I save somebody by putting on a meal goes towards buying lighter fluid.
Maybe I have an advantage over the all the cops out there in that I don't have to enforce any laws. I'm sure that affects my perspective on things, but I can't be cynical in the face of pain. Whether it's self inflicted or not.
I'd say that mine was facing the true nature of grace and faith and child-likeness.
I was supposed to be much simpler than it is and the reality sometimes leaves me winded and dizzy.
But - like you, the longer I spend doing this the harder it is to see the difference between the saints and the sinners.